Kawan Baxter
5/21/06

Anansi  our Hero
“New York City, A den of lions starving to the bone. A city built on preying on the weak. Now nothing is left but lions, criminals. Drug dealers, murderers, gangs and etcetera roam the streets for their next target. No man can stand up the unending bile of debauchery that cramps this city. I though, am no longer a man. I have evolved. One hand alone could not crush the bowls of this city so I grew eight, and I, Anansi the spider shall strangle the lion and then blast it away with my stream of Justice.”

Anansi  pissed a line into the back of a urinal. The peeing teen’s skin was dark as the night.  Despite the sweltering summer heat outside, he wore a black cotton turtleneck, tight black jeans, black socks and black combat boots to match. The only thing on him not darkly colored was the wide silver tape wrapped around his whole head. The duck tape supported tentacle like strands that came up and out on each corner of his head like disjointed dreads. The getup was made to mimic a spider, a dark spider, like a black widow but male. The silver duct tape served both the functional purpose of holding up the strands that represented his other four legs and it made for some cool head gear. Anansi brought out his full force, pissing into the back of that urinal. All the while he fantasized about crushing the villainy he faced on a daily bases.

Suddenly a shine sent a white flash  across his vision. “It can’t be” thought Anansi. Behind him stood a pale skinned bald ruffian. The sparkling came from the platinum, diamond encrusted snake tattoo. The tattoo started by using the ruffian’s eye as its own. The snake’s body wound  all the way down the guys arms, made visible by the guy’s sleeveless camouflage vest. He also wore blue jeans and clean white sneakers.

“I finally caught you with your hands full Anansi. Time for me to repay you for all those beatings.”

A smile  swept across Anansi’s face and he spun around quick. the unyielding piss now shot out at the man. The man jumped left like he was dodging a rocket. He then yanked open a stall door and hid behind it. Anansi pivoted toward the man and crashed his water pressure against the door.

“Onini the Python!” smirked Anansi.

“You saved me the trouble of having to hunt you down today.”

Anansi released his thing, which kept itself straight through a mighty stream of piss.

“There is a warrant out for your arrest for theft of car radios. Also do to the new Platinumization of your tattoo while receiving a bi-weekly welfare check, I will personally add the charge of money wasting to your crime bill. Now Onini, any last words to the tax payer before I...I.. I collect your taxes.”

“Money wasting is not a crime” Onini wailed from behind the stall.

“Anyway, this is an investment into my self worth. People will respect me, they will fear me, they will Love me.” Onini victoriously announced.

The sound of the mighty blast subsided into a tinkle then is soothed out entirely. Onini dashed out from behind the stall door. He ran toward Anansi who yanked up on his pants zipper. Onini clenched his fist together and slammed down at Anansi. Anansi leaped high into the air, landing on one of the bathroom sinks.

“A python has no legs. A spider has eight. Now Snaky, what made you think you could catch a spider.

Anansi reached between the zipper of his pants and pulled out two cherry firecrackers, one in each hand.

“Also my dare invertebrate. Anansi the spider is always prepared. He always has a plan. Now swallow this whole, Snaky.”

Anansi coughed up a lighter between his teeth. With his tongue, he ignited the flame, sparking the two cherry bombs.

“Swallow this, snake mouth.”

He launched both bombs right at Onini who caught them in his hand and then threw them back.

“NOOOOO!” the spider screamed.

Anansi  tossed them back at Onini

“A snake isn’t supposed to have hands.” yelled Anansi.

Onini threw them back to Anansi, Anansi threw them back to Onini. Onini  tried to throw them back, but Anansi double kicked him in the chest before Onini could exert forward momentum. The bombs flew into the air. One bomb hit the ceiling, the other bounced off of a wall. They both landed in two adjacent stalls. Two separate automatic toilets roared as they flushed simultaneously. Both warriors were silent. they both stared at the toilets. Anansi was the first to hug Onini.

“If were doomed we might as well go as brothers” Onini cried as he hugged Anansi back.

*BOOM*

Water and other unmentionables blasted over and threw the stalls. The Bathroom quickly flooded as the water exploded toward the entrance. Water gushed from out the bathroom, carrying anything not soldered down.  Riding the wave as it dissipated on the ground sat a completely dry Anansi. Under him lay The unconscious body of the soaked Onini the python.

“Sucker.” Anansi smirked.

Anansi  stood up and calmly splashed his way out of the electronic store. Anansi reached into his pocket and pulled out a scrap of paper. He switched that paper into his other hand and then dug his hand into his pocket  and pulled out a purple mechanical pencil. It was one he randomly picked up from his living room. There were 4 names written on the list. Anansi scratched out the first one, Onini the python. The next name written down was Osebo the Leopard. Anansi smiled. He was eager to meet her again; her apartment was close too.

Anansi stalked casually through his concrete jungle. The buildings on either side of him averaged at about six stories high. It was the middle of the day, so people roamed the streets. Some gave him awry looks. Those people were the latecomers, those who did not know of his coming, but 1 out of every 50 or 2 out of every 100 smiled his way. They had already caught on to his heroism.

Anansi came up to another burgundy building like all the others. In front laid a small staircase leading to a door. That door was for people with keys and on the staircase stood and sat a lot of teens in hoodies. Anansi would have been too embarrassed to bother them. Next to the staircase stood another door. He went in. To his left hung a switchboard full of apartment numbers. “6E” He pressed.

“Hello.” Said Anansi into the machine.

“Hello.” Responded A beautacious (beautiful and......loquacious) Hispanic voice.

“Um.. I want to buy that green stuff.” Anansi answered.

*Beep*

The next door unlocked. Anansi passed the door, boarded the elevator and waited for his stop. The elevator door opened. Anansi passed the black staircase and turned the knob on the black door.  “She unlocked it for me.”  Another smirk graced the spider’s lips. Slamming the door completely brought him into another world. Plants off all kind(mostly marijuana) made it so that he could only walk a single file. To either side of him, greens with dashes of purple, reds, blues and oranges made him feel like he was in a real jungle. A few turns brought him to where he needed to be. In front of a window In a Hammock strung together by two trees laid a women with waist length curly brown hair. The lady in the leaped print dress tilted her head his way. Her large hooped gold earrings hung from her head over the hammock. She stared at Anansi.

“WHAT! You again!” She screamed.

“Of course it’s me beautiful. Didn’t you hear me when I said hello. Don’t tell me, you haven’t remembered my voice yet.”

Anansi hung his head low.

“No. Why would I recognize your voice. Anyway Anansi leave me alone. I have work to do.”

“I came here with a business propositions.” Anansi said with a new found smile.

“Become my sidekick, no, my loving partner and together we will fight crime in perfect unity.” Anansi clenched his fist in front of him.

“HAHAHAHA” Laughed the leopard.

“Fight crime? Why would I ever settle with such trivial man made regulations. Nature left us with things that make us feel good. Who is man to deem natures work immoral.”

“This is your last chance Osebo. If you do not side with me now. I will be forced to burn your stock to the ground.”

“No!”
Osebo sprung up from her hammock.

“Leave my forest alone!”

“I’m sorry hot tamale” Anansi coughed.

He coughed and coughed until he regurgitated his lighter.

“I’m sorry Hot tamale. You’re going to have to get burned.”

With the lighter gripped between his teeth, two more cherry bombs appeared in his hands. He lit them and Launched them amidst the “Trees”. A stronger sense of orange overcame all the greens in the apartment.

Before Anansi could look forward again Osebo the leopard was already right in front of his face. She swung.  “Wow she’s fast” Anansi thought “But a woman’s punch couldn’t possibly-“

Anansi’s feet lifted out of his combat boots. His body flew  backwards. the force of his soaring body snapped a few branches before he smashed into a wall.

“My face, don’t hurt my face!”

Anansi threw his arms up over his face. Osebo tried to punch him in the eyes, but his arms were in the way, so she worked his body with fist strong enough to come from a leopard, yet fast enough to be jabs. Each punch bounced Anansi’s body off the wall. His spine felt every blow. He tried to dodge out of the way, but  however Anansi moved Osebo’s punches found their target.

Anansi heard glass shatter behind him. He Looked over his shoulder.

“AHH Don’t knock me out of the window, we’re on the six floor!”

Anansi could see the blackness in her eyes though. She was in beast mode now. There was no waking her up. Osebo arched back for the final blow. For Anansi everything became bright and slow. These were his final moments of life. Anansi reached his arms out. “If I’m going to die I’m going to die a man....a spider.” Anansi’s hands firmly grasped Osebo’s well endowed boobs. At the same time her punch smashed into Anansi’s skull sending erratic nerves throughout his body, locking his hands in place.  Anansi’s body tipped over the window ledge.

“WAIT!” screamed an awakened Osebo.

“You’re going to pull me down with you...Nooo!” she shrieked as they slipped out of the window.
“Anansi didn’t care though. he had already resolved he with going to die, but where his hands were allowed him to die with a smile on his face.

*BOOM*

Their bodies crashed into the ground.

“Did you see that. That spider guy tried to save the drug dealer, Osebo from that burning apartment. He’s a hero” said a kid standing on the block.

It was the last thing Anansi heard before he blacked out.

The world was black but warm, kind of like being asleep and peeing on yourself. The warm sensation took over.

That warm sensation became scorching hot. Anansi opened his eyes to see the entire apartment complex in front of him being overrun with dark orange flames and pillowing black smoke.

“My home, everything that I had destroyed.” Cried a man shrouded in a yellow hoodie and black jeans.

Other guys in the same outfit crowded  around him, tears fell down their hoodies. Anansi looked up. His hands faced skyward and were grasping nothing but air. Anansi’s eyes  quickly searched the area for Osebo. She laid on a stretcher. A cop in a hat stood next to her.  Anansi stood up. His bones cracked and sinews sinewed, but he managed to make it to his feet. He walked over to his fallen love. A thick gray blanket laid over everything but her face. She was breathing hard.

“You should be ashamed of yourself.” The cop said looking at Osebo.

“Look what your drugs have brought the people of this neighborhood. They have lost their homes because of you.”

“But” Osebo struggled hard to get her words out.

“But it was him.” Her eyes tilted over to Anansi.

“It was Anas-“

Anansi quickly pressed one of his gloved hands over her mouth.

“What?” said the cop”

“She’s delirious” responded Anansi.

“You know  It’s all that oxygen....It’s bad for the brain you know...hahaha.”

Anansi ran off down the street. Anansi reached inside his pocket. His paper was still there. He yanked it out. His pencil was broke in half but there was still lead trapped inside the bottom part.

“I get to scratch off another name.”

An image reoccurred to him; the guy in the yellow hoodie. “Those guys, they were the Moboro Hornets gang. Looks like they are going to be preoccupied for a while.” Anansi scratched their name off the list too. There was one more name written on his list.

Anansi slowed his running to a walk. He continued till he was in the suburban part of the Bronx. The fuchsia two story house in front of him belonged to no villain he was aware of. Anansi walked up to the guys house. He turned the knob. The door opened.

“Looks like He’s home” Anansi whispered.

In front of Anansi laid a set of stairs and to the left a living room. A widescreen HD TV showed the FBI warning, signaling the start of a movie. In a black leather couch sat a guy in a turban and a-

“ WHY ARE YOU ONLY IN A SPEEDO!”

“And who might you be.” The muscular man dressed only in a turban and a indigo speedo said as he turned his head toward  Anansi with a smirk on his face”

“I have heard of the heinous crime you have committed and I am here to bring you a little street justice. Your movies are 97 days late. Now return...”

Anansi pulled another list from his pocket. Reading the names of the two overdue movies made his black cheeks go red. He slammed the list onto the floor, even though once he released the list it floated down at its own speed.

“Time to be vanquished evil doer.”

The man stood up. his turban fell off his head. long black hair floated behind his pristine peck, arm and shin muscles.”

“Really?” The man answered with a lisp.

“Then I guess you can feel the loathing of-“

The man pulled a string connected to something black tied onto his back. Two plastic butterfly wings popped out.

“Moatia, the invisible Fairy~” The man raised his arms and basked himself in the blue TV Sheen.

Anansi jumped back.

“A new villain. I expected as much. A den of lions has received a new cub, but in every grassland filled with lions there is always one hyena; a mirror in which the sun of justice can reflect its magesticness.”

*CRASH*

Moatia leaped through his front window shattering the glass. He landed a good way away from the window and continued running. He turned his head around and shouted at Anansi.

“Sorry, I don’t like to fight.”

Anansi followed the guy and leaped threw the window. Anansi rolled when he hit the ground, occurring many puncture wounds and new glass ornaments. He shook away the pain though. He ran after Moatia.

“A flying virgule which sings the zenith of an epoch, an arachnid that stands taller than any Insect. Whether day or night, blistering cold or sun like heat. Like the mailman I never rest. I am the Man, The Hero. No prey shall escape ANANSI THE SPIDER.